two snow days in a row + winter wonderland

If you're a West Michigander, you are probably quite aware that the January snow has arrived. From shoveling to snow plowing to slipping on those white-covered roads, winter is here. For awhile there, I thought we might not get any snow but I was definitely mistaken.

I'm sure the local children started jumping up and down and wailing when they discovered that school was cancelled Tuesday and today, but when I got the memo, I was unfortunately not as excited. I remember as a child watching the news station flip through the cancellations, crossing my fingers and toes in hopes that we had a snow day. As an hourly employee at the school now, I was a little disappointed. I actually enjoy working with the students everyday, hearing their extravagant stories, and watching them grow.

So, for the last two days, I have been bundled up, trying to keep myself busy as the wind blows outside my window. Who knows if we'll have a third snow day tomorrow but for once, I hope we do because my dad will be having surgery on his back tomorrow and I wish I could be there for him. We shall see.

I did venture into the cold abyss to capture the beauty of freshly fallen snow with my free time. Sadie, my black lab shepherd mix, loves to dive into the fluff. She is adorable with all those flakes on her black fur.

snowflakes a' fallin'

snow looks so beautiful perked on the branches

i borrowed my mom's boots and i definitely got some snow in my socks

sadie looks like she's stalking something

the boughs were sagging with all that snow hanging on them

 close your eyes, let the snowflakes fall on your face, experience winter firsthand

2015 || a year of questions

Looking back at the year in comparison to 2014, I couldn't help but feel like what was the point of 2015? But then I came across a quote that seemed to put it all in perspective:

"There are years that ask questions, and there are years that answer." -Zora Neale Hurston

After reading this quote, I realized that although things didn't always turn out the way I wanted them to, there was still a point to the year. 2015 was a year of questions that I didn't know the answers to. I asked and asked and asked and am still asking with seemingly no response, but I think it's important to stop obsessing over receiving the answer right now and allowing the questions to just be. The answers will come, I just have to wait and keep the door open for receiving. 

Knowing I have been stubborn and probably hard on myself, I took a look through my photos from the year, and it reminded me of the good memories I had in the last 12 months. So here it goes ---

I lived in Washington state on the beautiful Bainbridge Island. I would walk down to the pebbly beach and watch the ferry glide in, then take off to Seattle. I was grateful for a warm, snowless winter in the Pacific Northwest.

I worked with some of the most passionate, humble, loving people I've known. I don't have pictures of all the people I love from YES!, but here are a few. Top left: Miles who made me watch wrestling, but only after watching the Bachelor with me. Top right: Erin who brought out the sassy in me and always had my articles looking their best. Bottom left: Mary and James. Mary was my girl from the day I moved into the YES house. We spent nights at the Alehouse, traveled over to Seattle, and had conversations about life <3 her dearly. James always gave me a new way to look at issues I was writing about and gave me the boost to dig deep. Bottom right: Morgan who brought her bubbly personality and wonderful insights into any conversation. 

Missing: Christa who believed in my voice and did everything with love and compassion. Jim who was the sweetest and kindest person (plus always brought home bread). Susan who gave the best advice and always gave a helping hand. Natasha who was such a beautiful artist and kicked butt on our hike. Peter who I wish I had gotten to know more, but was not only a caring individual but also a fiction writer! There were so many others I was grateful to work with day and day out.

Other notable things I did with my YES folks: had wonderful family dinners, watched the Super Bowl (Seattle Seahawks vs New England Patriots) in a Seattle bar that was only standing room. It was so sad to see the Seahawks lose and in the way that they did. We worked at the HUB, chilled in the beer garden, debated where solutions journalism was going and what part we had in the process, spent a few days in a beach house and singing by a fire in the rain, and eating deep dish pizza while talking about the effect of global warming.

I adventured around Seattle alone. I went to the Frye Museum of Art, Elliot Bay Book Co., wandered the streets, got lost, got rained on, found cool things, and explored. It really felt empowering to be able to just walk and find new things everywhere I looked.

I learned how awesome hackerspaces and makerspaces are after talking to the Seattle Attic, FemHack, Hacker Gals, and a few others. This is the first time I saw direct change and action being made from an article I wrote. I still haven't visited Hacker Gals, but I really want to in the near future. Stacy, the founder, is such a sweet person and I want to get an update on what they're doing.

In the second part of the internship, I really started to love the topics I was writing about, like the hackerspaces one, the article about hip-hop artist Jasiri X and how he is bringing awareness about social justice through his music (and literally got so starstruck, like heart beating extra fast, falling in love type of feelings when watching his videos), and the article about breweries turning to sustainable methods to help stop global warming (I also liked talking to Rick Williams about restorative justice, but that was in December 2014 so it doesn't count).

I learned so much, talked to some amazing people, got frustrated a few times, but enjoyed being a part of bringing positive news to the public. Go solutions journalism!

One of my favorite places to be - always - Intentional Table. I walked into the studio, really shy, and walked out with a job helping the food and wine studio with social media. Not only did I learn a lot about food, but I learned a lot about life from the owner and my second mom, Zoe. She is the most inspirational, go-getter, loving person I know. Every single day I spent with her was amazing and her presence always put me in a better mood. 

I also met some other wonderful people at Intentional Table including Heather, Abby, Marsha, and Carla. They are the sweetest.

But, wait. Let's step back a moment and look at the things that didn't go so well. I felt lost, not knowing where I should go and what I should do with my life. I loved the things I was doing at YES, but it was hard, time consuming, and I didn't know if I could get a job doing something like this. My dad had health issues, which pulled me to want to go home.

I ended up deciding to stay in Seattle. Got a room in a house with five other girls. The landlord didn't even tell them that I was moving in, so when I got there with all my things, they looked shocked that a random person was bringing all their stuff inside. I felt alone, isolated, couldn't find a job. The room I was in had basically no heat. I enjoyed going to the library, so that was a plus.

With my dad being sick and me not feeling happy and having a hard time finding a job, I got a plane ticket home to Michigan. 

I felt happy to be home, but also like a failure. I got a job working at Camp Miniwanca, which brought me a lot of joy and a little bit of office drama. I still felt like I wasn't living up to what I should've been. 

I had my first poem published in print! Besides being published, it was also displayed in the Bainbridge Island Public Library lobby. Read about it here.

I spent a bunch of time with this guy. Baked pies, went to a birthday party, spent a day with his family kayaking down a river (so much fun, but he had to rescue me a million times...oops), watched hours of Game of Thrones and Grey's Anatomy, made jar salads, introduced him to a scoby (hilarious!), went on a Stony Lake boat tour and a bunch of other things #alwaysmybestfriend #lovehimtopieces - side note: one of these pics is a throwback from years ago - can you guess it?

Had such a blast at the Speak Like A Girl show featuring Megan Falley and Olivia Gatwood. They are kick ass women that talk about rape culture, social norms, feminism and a lot of other topics, but in a way that knocks your socks off. Highly recommend watching their videos, buying their books, and watching them live. I also got to listen to the Sharon Olds! I went with one of my best friends and ran into another friend from high school. He got us into the after party, where we got to have conversation with these fierce women. It was an amazing night.

Had a Yarwood family reunion! I hadn't seen these cousins in such a long time - some of them I had never even met. I also joined in on a sand dune ride at Silver Lake. Even though I've lived 10 minutes from the lake my entire life, I had never been in a dune buggy. It was realllllly bumpy!

And spent some time with my girls! We went out for Halloween. Jasmine and Lauren were 70s glam girls and I was a robber. I never get to see my G11 gals enough, but I surprised them and visited on my birthday HA! They had invited me to a party and didn't know it was my birthday, but how better could I have spent it? Had such a great time and I listened to a bunch of (actually) really good karaoke.

Here comes 2016, let's give it all we've got and more.

♥ Kay

Poem from the Mitten

Poetry time! As you might know, I love poetry and therefore I'd like to share a poem from the book "How the Losers Love What's Lost." I read this book by Patrick Ryan Frank last year and have dog-eared pages galore. On top of his wonderful poetry, he is a Michigan native just like me! 

WHAT I WANT FROM THE WORLD 

by Patrick Ryan Frank

On some bright beach in Hawaii,

in some dim year of the past,

one leper in love with another

says, Take my hand. That's all --

sweet joke or two, quick touch,

an elegy on a postcard.

Not much, no more than moments

of luck in a luckless life,

of trouble beautifully lit.

So let the lepers think

the numbness of their lips

is love. Let the sharks

be far and slow. Let

nobody see their bodies

as they run into the sea

with the sun in tatters on

the water, with laughter, a wind

through palms that sounds like Please.

REGULARITY

This is part of a series on my journey through the 18-ities that were highlighted in Happinez Magazine. You can read how the article spoke to me here, and also check out the first -ity: serenity.

Confession: I have a hard time with the second -ity: regularity. It's a love/hate relationship. I desperately claw for a routine that will lead me towards my soul's purpose, but tend to give up easily if I don't get quick results. I don't put 100 percent into things because I doubt that it will benefit me, that I will succeed, if it's the right choice, or I'm just being plain lazy.

I think regularity can come in many forms. It can be waking up and meditating before getting ready for the day, telling someone how much you care about them, or dedicating time to something you love everyday.

The things that become regular will definitely impact your life. An action can start off as an occasional occurrence, and quickly develop into a habit, so it is important to be aware and intentional about what you do and how you treat yourself. If you look in the mirror and tell yourself you're ugly it can easily escalate and manifest in your mood, what you accomplish, and how you treat others.

The Happinez article wrote: "Regularity forms the basis of spiritual practise; it's the best way to calm a restless spirit. It's for this reason that ashrams have a strict daily routine. Habits form grooves, like millstones, which in time become smooth. It takes time but once a groove is etched, it can be forgotten because it's been indelibly printed in our memory. So get up a fixed time and meditate at a fixed time. Take the time to reflect on the day's events, and cherish that moment."

Both of the photos were taken 11.18.15. What a beautiful sunset in Michigan.

What are some of your current regularities?

To be honest, mine have been unhealthy lately. After a recent breakup and not being sure about my next career move, I have not treated myself in the best way. But you know what? Now that I have been honest with myself and am aware of these actions, I can create steps to move away from these patterns.

What regularities would you like to incorporate into your daily routine?

I have started to meditate, but have not made it a full-blown regularity. I need to create a time to do that every day because it allows me to slow down and tune into my body. It is common for people to keep their lives in busy-mode 24/7 and this isn't healthy. The result? Physical manifestations of stress.

I would also like to take time to reflect on my day as a part of my new regularity. I tried to start doing this in the form of "pits and peaks" where I would go through and find something that didn't go so well and something good that happened. I tend to look back at my life and wonder what even happened, and this would make me reflect on how I live my life.

Another regularity that I would like to enforce is writing and reading. These are two of my passions, but I tend not to parcel time for them. I am distracted with things that do not benefit my life like television and surfing useless things on the internet. I can do those things in moderation, but be aware of how much time I spend on those things and realize what will benefit me the most.

Last but not least, I need to tell my loved ones what they mean to me. This can be in the form of a simple "I love you" or sending a card to someone saying that I'm thinking of them. This regularity comes with another stipulation -- I need to really access my relationships and be true to myself on how I feel about them. These words can't be said just to be said, they need to come a place of purity.

I hope you take a look at your regularities and think about how they serve you. Make intentional regularities and you'll be a lot happier. I'll try to do the same.

Brussels Sprouts + Bowls of Spiders + Black Roses

Who likes brussels sprouts? OK, don't raise your hands all at the same time. I feel like green vegetables tend to get prematurely judged. Yes, brussels sprouts look like tiny cabbages, but just let me tell you, they are delicious (even ask my dad). This year, when we were picking out the plants to grow in our garden, I set my eye on a brussels sprouts plant, even though my parents had their doubts about if it would grow well.

So this week, we pulled those suckers out by their roots and started chopping off those round pieces of heaven one by one until we had a pot full. When you get them in the grocery stores (especially frozen) they tend to be bitter. I have more than once spit out a brussels sprout. But not these homegrown ones, they were perfection.

Brussels sprouts grow on a long stem. My dad and I had cut off all the leaves before this pic was taken.

Boil 'em, steam 'em, maybe even eat them raw.

Isn't this just a wonderful picture of the harvest moon? I'm not sure who shot this picture -- either my mom or dad -- but I couldn't help but share.

Back in the day, we decorated to scare all the kids who would trample through our haunted garage. Since then, we've toned it down a bit, made it classier I guess.

 Black rose, black dress, black heart. Hey, have you listened to the song "Black Roses" by the beautiful Clare Bowen (from one of my fav shows, Nashville)? If not, watch it. It's unbelievable.

Bowl full of spiders? Obviously!

 We've had this skeleton for yeeeeeeeears. His name is Mr. Bones. Maybe he shouldn't have played with that Ouija board. Am I right?

It's fall. Break out the hats!

Look at my precious Sadie. She always lays on the ground in front of this window, watching for my dad to come up the driveway.

Can you believe All Hallow's Eve is this weekend? Love it & can't wait.

Wisdom comes from those who take risks

The skies were dark with rain clouds today, making it feel like 6 p.m. when it was only 3. My day had been chaotic when a vibrant spirit walked into the lobby of my newest place of work. This greying woman had wet droplets on her jacket from the rain and the smell of blooming lilacs wafted in behind her as she approached me at the front desk. Many of you probably don’t know, but I am back in Michigan for the summer working at the American Youth Foundation Miniwanca, a camp on the shore of Lake Michigan. My primary duty at the camp is to help run seasonal staffing and this woman had come to sign in as a part of the medical team.

After gathering a stack of paperwork for her to fill out, we moved to comfy leather chairs, and as she began to write, I started to make small talk. She told me she loved the rain and could easily live in Seattle. I told her I had just gotten back from Seattle and that I also loved the rain. She told me about the last few years she worked on the medical team at Camp Miniwanca, talking about how excited she was to again be part of a dynamic duo in East Camp.

Wrinkles grew deep as she smiled telling me stories from her time in Hawaii – her home for over a decade. She moved back to Michigan just two years ago with no car or apartment, just stayed at her sister’s house for a few days before voyaging over to Miniwanca for the summer with no previous work in camps and not knowing what to expect.

With each new detail from her life, I was more amazed by this woman in front of me. Before knowing anything about her life, I had stereotyped her. This 70-something year-old woman expanded and inspired me, but it was one simple phrase that resonated with me – “I like change. I enjoy being adventurous.” It was more than just the phrase though, it was a combination of how her voice lowered, her eyes lit up, how her age had not dampened her energy and spirit for doing what excited her. And also that she seemed to be voyaging on this journey of life solo. She was a strong woman that talked with vigor and life and in that moment, I was jealous of her vivacity.

I’ve been making changes to my life and thinking a lot about what I want my future to be. I have to admit, it can change depending on what I’m reading, hearing and learning. But when it comes down to it, there are a few things that I feel are building blocks to my happiness: travel, poetry, art, writing, and adventure. I have goals to see new parts of the world, experience new cultures, and read as much poetry as I can. If I had it my way, I’d travel around the world, reading local poets’ work, interviewing them and finding out what makes them write such beautiful lines. Is this what my future holds? I don’t know, but it’s fun to think about.

We’ll see where my passions take me, but it is nice to be reminded that life isn’t about doing the 9-5 grind, but creating a life that sustains that passionate, happy, vibrant feeling throughout the entirety of your life. 

"And to love life through labour is to be intimate with life's inmost secret." -Kahlil Gibran

Merry Christmas

My mom says I'm grumpy on Christmas mornings. I probably have the "I'm still half asleep. Why do I have to be up this early" look on my face, and my attitude probably matches. When I asked my dad on Christmas Eve what time we had to be up in the morning and he replied with 7 a.m., I laughed saying we should move it back a few hours. That's just not how it works in our house though.

When I was a child, I would try to stay up as late as I could, waiting to hear the hooves of reindeer on the roof. I would wake up in the middle of the night and skitter into the living room to peek in my stocking and see if Santa had brought me the one big thing I had wished for. It was always sitting on the couch, unwrapped.

I guess over the years my eagerness to be up on Christmas morning has declined, but it's still such a magical day. I get to watch the faces of my family light up as they open the presents they didn't expect or are excited to receive.

It's tradition that my Spears side of the family comes over for breakfast. And let me tell ya, it's a feast. We have bacon, sausage, eggs, cinnamon rolls, potatoes, and my favorite - a huge assortment of fruit. I look forward to, not only the delicious breakfast, but the company of my cousins that I don't get to see very often.

On the Schultz side, we get together whenever it is convenient for everyone. The last couple years we have been extending our party out to friends and relations beyond my aunts and cousins. That's what's so great about the holiday season - we get to catch up with the people we love.

First of all, I'm supporting CMU. Second of all, I was so excited to get my favorite Disney movie Sleeping Beauty. Third, yes, I'm grumpy.

I guess my dad and mom had gone to a pawn shop and she set her eyes on an antique stove that was in the shop. My dad said she was "raving about it." He logged it in his memory and went back to get it for her for Christmas. I'm not sure where she's going to put it, but take note all you men out there. Listen to your woman and you'll make her very happy.

My daddy unwrapping the gift I got him: a memory foam neck pillow. He hurt his shoulder awhile ago and has been sleeping in the chair every night. Hope this helps a bit.

Mom, dad, me, and grandma making Christmas breakfast.

My mom is a master decorator (did you see her table at Thanksgiving?). My brother's place card was held by a wizard...I mean Santa.

All workin' in the kitchen. I'm cutting apples for our fruit platter, my dad is cooking sausage, and my mom is flipping the bacon. Teamwork!

This is only a small portion of my mom's Christmas village. The first picture is also of her village.

My mom and I don't know how to take a good picture.

A row of angels looking over us.

My cousin smiling beautifully, and her fiance, Jordan.

My place card was a sled. Isn't everything at the table just so cute?

Me, my cousin Autumn, and Jill (aka the other Autumn). Funny story. My mom texted my cousin, Nick, to tell him about Christmas plans. He said he was bringing Autumn (his sister), his girlfriend, and his dog. My mom thought he meant his girlfriend's name was Autumn, so she put that name on her place setting and her gift. Come to find out, her name is Jill. Whoops.

Nick and his dog. This is an 80 lb puppy and runs so crazy. He also got on the table and had a few bites of cinnamon roll. I don't blame him, they were really good.

The table centerpiece.

My Sadie girl. She was looking at those squirrels running around outside. As you can see, there was no snow. It was basically the same weather as Seattle.

Colton and I. He was giving my grandma a lecture about not taking pictures with flash (preach!) and he told me to take a pic with him to show grandma. I asked if we could take a pic with his really good camera and he refused. Later he said that if I didn't make such a big deal about taking a picture with him, he would do it. I wasn't making a big deal about it (at first). I never win.

I brought this Bainbridge Island ferry ornament home to put on our tree. It even has little cars on it.

My brother showing my Aunt Cheri some stuff on her camera.

Steph and Claire. That little girl is getting so big.

Little miss Chloe was all cuddles at the Schultz Christmas party. My aunt took a pic of Chloe, Isaac (her brother) and I all cuddling on a very comfortable chair, but my dad missed the photo op. Love them.

Hope everyone had an amazing holiday, too.