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Saturday, September 10, 2016

Excuses are not enough


This post is a prelude to Natalie's 10 Day Freedom Plan Blog Challenge Day 1.


Around this time two years ago, I had just moved clear across the country - from Michigan to Washington state - to begin the life I had dreamed of for years. I began as an intern at YES! Magazine, a non-profit publication whose goal is to inform people on issues and then give them practical action steps on how to make a difference in society.

I loved my co-workers, the environment, Bainbridge Island, the short ferry ride to Seattle, how the articles I wrote seemingly made a difference to the readers, and the new independence I felt living in city that had so much to explore. I learned a tremendous amount, met interesting people with unique perspectives, and experienced so many new things.

When the internship came to an end though, I wasn't sure what to do. Like always, fear and courage came together at a peak, each bringing seemingly valid points to the argument of to stay or leave Seattle.

I ended up deciding to stay. I found a room to rent and started looking for a job, but those fears I mentioned earlier kept creeping back into my mind. I looked and looked for a job, but kept getting discouraged. Every day I became more stressed about sustaining myself. I applied at the Target within walking distance of my house, but they even denied me. This dream life of mine was becoming less and less visible.

I ended up buying a ticket home.

I felt like I had failed, I felt ashamed that I couldn't make it work, and I was embarrassed that I let fear swoop in.

After a few months home, I came across an article that brought the life back in my eyes. It featured Shay Brown and Cassie Torrecillas of Bucketlist Bombshells talking about their new Work Online and Travel the World Course. They had decided to drop the 9-5 routine and embark on a digital nomad lifestyle where they would travel around the world working from their laptops. This was my first introduction to this type of lifestyle and, let me tell you, I was hooked.

But that initial inspiration slowly dissipated as obligations arose and those full days of work left me tired. I didn't finish the course, but kept saying I would make time for it.

A year later, Cassie and Shay start promoting their next round of the course. I thought it was the perfect time to get back in the saddle and begin the course again. I began, but yet again, haven't finished. Oh how those excuses pile up.

When I look at my life, there seems to be so many avenues that I could and want to go down. There's the dream to travel the world, working from my laptop in villages awaiting exploration and experience. There's the dream of living in Seattle, working at a publication. There's the dream of being an author and writing something that will mean something to someone. There's the dream of opening a boutique and selling beautiful things. There's the dream of creating parties that will give people memories for a lifetime. There's so much I want to do, yet the thought of that is so overwhelming that it can cause me to procrastinate and make no progress down any of the avenues. Not good.

The ultimate question is: what will make me happy?
But the question I need to analyze first is: what challenges are holding me back from making necessary changes so I can begin to live the life that will make me happy?

And that is what I'll conquer in my next post [view it here]

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