A new season, new household, new everything

 Easter is one of my favorite holidays. I can't really describe what makes it so special. Maybe because it feels like it's the gateway to Spring (my favorite season). Kids hunt for eggs beside tiny mounds of melting snow or behind the tiny green stalks burrowing out of the dirt. I like bunnies and pastels and jello eggs (jello poured into egg-shaped molds and a tradition in my household) and flowers and family.

This year, Easter was a day of transition and a reminder of what I'm getting myself into.

On Saturday, I planned on taking a few of my bags over to my new room. I wanted to prove my independence by transporting all my things myself, but quickly realized that it would be nearly impossible. I could do it, but it would take many trips on the ferry and bus to accomplish this task. I really didn't realize how much stuff I had and how heavy it would be until I packed it all up and tried to move it.

I thought I should pack up one back and bring it over to my room, so I filled my backpack with books and headed out to meet the house manager to get my keys. A few things went wrong though. I missed the ferry I was going to catch, the next ferry was late, then the manager asked if I'd rather meet her downtown in the International District. Not having a smartphone that can easily access a map, I had to ask for help from my parentals (2,000 miles away) for directions. After their valuable help, I did find the way, but after trekking up steep Seattle hills with a 50 lb backpack, I was beat.

I wasn't sure if I wanted to get on the bus and go all the way to my apartment, but finally decided to just do it. When I arrived, the roommates were surprised to see me. Little did I know, the house manager supposedly doesn't have very good communication with the tenants and didn't tell them I was moving in. It was awkward for them, awkward for me, awkward all around.

I sat down with one of them who was watching reruns of 90210, but after awhile decided to head back to Bainbridge. On the bus ride home, I asked Clo, the office manager at YES! and angel house mom, if she would be able to help my transport my stuff. Thank goodness she said yes.

So yesterday, Clo helped me move my stuff in the afternoon after she picked up the new graphics intern and showed her around the island. When I got to my new place, I unpacked a little and then ventured out to the store.

At the intern house, the rooms were furnished. They had towels, comforters, blankets, pillows - but not here. In Jas' words, I was going to have to "rough it," meaning buy an air mattress and live minimally but when I got to Target, they were closed because it was Easter. I would really have to "rough it." So much for loving Easter.

Heading back, I saw Walgreens was open, so I wandered in. I looked around a bit and went down the discount aisle. That's when I found it: an air mattress. Thank goodness I wouldn't have to sleep on the ground but when I got home, I realized that it didn't have a pump and I'd have to blow it up myself. So I put Grey's Anatomy on and puff after puff blew that mattress up.

By the end, I was ready for bed. It was 9 p.m.

It was kind of chilly so I put on some thick socks, a sweatshirt and long pants. After tossing and turning, shivering, and downright freezing, I got up. I rearranged my sleepwear so I was wearing leggings, two pairs of long pants, two pairs of thick socks, a long sleeved shirt, sweatshirt, zip-up, hoodie, hat, scarf, and gloves. You're thinking I'm crazy right now, aren't you? I literally think I'm crazy too. I half wonder if it was psychological because I was still tossing, turning and cold all night.

When I woke up, guess what I did. I went to Target and bought a comforter. Hopefully I'm not as cold tonight. Oh the joy of moving somewhere with just a suitcase.

On the bright side, I got an Easter box from my parents and grandma at the end of last week. It brightened my transition. They put together a box of ingredients for Apple Salad (aka Kayla Salad because it's my favorite) and other Easter goodies. Here are a few pics from the box.

Coconut flavored popcorn, a bag full of candy from my grandma, biscotti, trail mix, apple salad ingredients, Bella Grace Magazine - THANKS!

Candy, candy and more candy!

My mom always decorates the box with seasonal paper. Here's an up-close view with a bunch of Spring-ish words.

Throwback to 2001 when I was helping with Easter dinner by arranging jello eggs.

I just booked a ticket back home to Michigan...APRIL FOOLS!

Wait...I'm staying in Seattle? Yup.

It was getting down to the wire. I had to choose: a plane ticket or an apartment.

There were pros and cons to each. It's so much safer to go home where I can see my family, cuddle with my dog and sleep in my room. But then again, would I be able to find a job in my small town? Well, I would be applying to places everywhere and could move to that location when I got the job. But it's so much harder to get a job when you aren't in that city. I do have a couple of leads on jobs I want in Seattle, but who knows when they will get back to me?

I struggled to sort through my thoughts and asked a TON of people their advice. B told me to get an apartment and take a chance because if I go home I could get stuck. My grandma said maybe I should wait it out and see if any of these jobs come through. She reminded me that my mom went to California when she was young and it opened her eyes and fostered a lot of self-growth. MSM told me to come home and then quickly changed his mind and said I better stay because I always do the opposite of what he says.

It was such a difficult decision. And then I made up my mind. I called my dad up and said with vigor "I'm coming home, Dad!" Guess what he said. He said that I have some really good opportunities in Seattle. He told me he wanted me to be happy and that he knows that I really want a job and that it wouldn't hurt to stick it out here. He'd hate to see me fly all the way back to Michigan and get an offer and have to fly all the way back to Seattle. "Think it over," he said.

Thanks a lot, Dad. I'd already thought about it so hard, why'd he have to go and mix me up again? That night, my mind was still set on going home. I think I was also so ready to leave because I had been looking for a room to rent with hardly any luck. If I were going to stay, I needed to know I wasn't going to be homeless. Finally, some people finally responded to me and although this didn't change my mind about leaving, it made me breathe a little easier.

So Monday, I decided to take a look at a room so I took the ferry across Puget Sound, wandered around until I found the Pioneer Square station, rode the bus across town, and walked until I found the house I was looking for. In her car was the rental manager. She showed me around the house and it looked like these girls were young, welcoming, fun people. There was a well-stocked bookshelf, St. Patrick's Day decorations, a dry erase board with their names and pictures of what they did (one had a stethoscope, another a cocktail, etc.). I told the lady I'd think about it and took a stroll. The public library was across from the bus stop and had a gorgeous little nature area. Just steps from that was a mall and shopping area and after awhile, I started to think I could see myself there.

So yesterday, I decided to jump on the opportunity. Even today I called my dad again upset and wanting to come home, but he talked me through it. I'm not sure what will come of it, but I'm going to work my tail off to get where I want to be, whether I stay here or go home. But for now, I'm going to try it out. Sooooo please send good vibes my way and I'll try to send some back. xoxo

Books + Museum + Rainy Afternoon in Seattle

To be quite honest, I feel like I'm pushing forward without a sense of what my path is. My internship at YES! is ending next week, I haven't booked a plane ticket anywhere (even though my parents keep asking me what day I'm flying home), I don't have any arrangements to stay in Seattle, and no job.

One way to look at the situation is I'm in deep trouble. Another way to look at it is I have a lot of options.

I mean, not everything happening in my life is bad. I have a second interview on Friday for a recipe editor position at a new cookbook app. I should hear back about a job at the Society of Professional Journalists headquarters next week. Also, my bestie who is living in California keeps telling me I always have the option of staying with her for as little or as long as I want. Plus home is always awaiting me with open arms.

The thing is, I just want to pave my own way and jump into this crazy life head and heart first.

Anyway, onto other things, Sunday I decided to take a trip to Seattle. I have been dying to visit the iconic Elliot Bay Company and Frye Art Museum, so here's some pics from my trip:

I was exhausted, but happy, when I finally saw Frye Art Museum. I'm still a little intimidated by public transportation, so I walk everywhere. This was quite a trek in the rain - ten blocks uphill! And when I say uphill, let me just tell you that it was so steep that people holding onto the wall as they were descending because the rain had made it so slippery.

After about eight blocks and soaked from the rain, I called my daddy. Yes, I rely on my dad even when we're over 2,000 miles apart. He assured me that I was almost to the museum and I kept on with my journey.

Hello, Frye. Nice to finally see you. Bonus: this museum is always free.

I wasn't totally thrilled with the exhibit, but there were a few pieces that caught my eye. Caption: Rud[olf?] Gliesch. Plate 68, Omamentik der Gegenwart, 1905-6. Published by Verlag Christian Stoll, Plauen, Germany.

Aubrey Beardsley. British, 1872-98. Illustrations in Sir Thomas Malory, Le Morte D'Arthur. Published by William Dent & Son, London, 1894. Limited Edition, two-volume set, bound in ivory cloth with gold decoration.

Henri Heran (pseudonym of Paul Hermann). German, 1864-1940. Spielendes Meerweib (Frolicking Mermaid), n.d. Color wood and lithograph. Published in Pan III, no. 4, 1897.

This was part of the featured artist: Rodrigo Valenzuela. I didn't get the info on this particular piece, but it was a big room that was set up with these canvases. The atmosphere was very industrial. The rest of his exhibit was videos. One showcased African American men talking picking up trash at a stadium and talking about their lives. Another was a series of videos. The one that I watched told the story of men crossing the Mexico-U.S. border and the atrocities that happened to them.

Valenzuela's exhibition was by far my favorite that the museum had on display.

Need a bike? Rent one at one of these stations.

After I left the museum, I was on my way to Elliot Bay. Except for the fact that between 9th Street and 10th street there are probably five non-numbered streets. So needless to say, I got a bit confused.

And that's when I stumbled upon Seattle University. As I walked by, I saw a beautiful garden and decided I had to take a detour.

Everyone should have a Shakespeare garden!

The campus is just beautiful. I felt right at home and loved the mossy steps and flowering gardens.

After being lost in the city, taking a breather in nature was definitely needed.

The campus is trying to be zero waste. They're doing this by making it easy for students to recycle and compost. Did you know that there's an ordinance in Seattle against putting food in the garbage? That's pretty awesome, right?

The area around Frye Museum and the campus of Seattle University were beautiful, so when I turned down 10th Street and found it kind of dirty, I wasn't sure if I should proceed in the direction Elliot Bay was supposed to be. I kept on going and was so happy when I saw this sign. I made it!

Can I just live here?

There were four long shelves of poetry - and most of it contemporary poetry! I was in heaven. I found this gem of a book Dear Lil Wayne by Lauren Ireland.

And of course I couldn't resist the urge to buy some poetry books. I've been obsessed with Write Bloody Publishing for yearsss (was hell-bent on interning there before they stopped offering internships) and when I was watching Button Poetry videos, I found Sarah Kay. Since then, I've been watching video after video after video after video of Sarah's. As for the Zachary Schomburg book, I just couldn't put it down.

I'm tired. Here's what's on my mind today:

Let's talk about this over coffee and chocolate chip cookie. Photo taken on the ferry.

One of my favorite bloggers, Sydney over at the Daybook, once in awhile goes through a list of words and puts a little comment by each. I like that idea, so below are a bunch of words and the thought that came to mind when I read the word. The fun in it is that the exercise reveals something a little different every time it's done. But anyway, here ya go:

Making: an effort to look at my environment more and in a different way.
Cooking: stir fry is my new thing and it's delicious if I say so myself.
Drinking: lots of water. I'm trying to drink 3 liters of water everyday, which if  you haven't tried it, is a ton and hard to do.
Reading: Practical Magic by Alice Hoffman. I recently watched the movie for the first time, and the two are so different. Alice Hoffman wrote my favorite book (The Dovekeepers), so I had to read another.
Wanting: to get a job that I love.
Looking: at my future and wondering what it holds. Things seem so unresolved and unknown right now.
Playing: with the idea of staying in Seattle.
Wasting: time. I shouldn't be procrastinating, but it's so ingrained in my nature.
Sewing: words together into poetry. Well, trying to write more anyway.
Wishing: the intentions I've been sending were manifesting.
Enjoying: the beautiful sunny, spring weather. Today someone was actually mowing their lawn.
Waiting: ...
Liking: that tomorrow I can work from my bed.
Wondering: how different my life would be if I didn't require sleep.
Loving: the music that's been playing on Spotify (Benjamin Fracis Leftwich-Stole You Away, The Head and the Heart-Rivers and Roads, Elliott Smith-Between the Bars)
Hoping: the dinner I'm going to make for my roommate is going to turn out (her internship is over and she's leaving me *sad face*)
Marveling: at how fast time flies.
Needing: soulful conversation.
Smelling: the shampoo/conditioner from my wet hair.
Wearing: pajamas (stretchy pants and the Shelby t-shirt I got in 5th grade when I went to Greenfield Village with my class).
Giggling: is something I haven't genuinely done in awhile.
Following: dirt trails in the forest is exhilarating.
Bookmarking:  this because it's too darn cute and this because I can't resist poetry.
Opening: a store of my own creeps into my mind a lot.

Lovin' the sun

I'm not sure how to say this without bragging, but Washington has had perfect weather the last few days - warm, sunny, and blue skies. Back home in Michigan, from what I hear, the snow has been debilitating. The Oceana County Sheriff's Department has been repeatedly urging people to stay off the roads and use caution when braving the storm. A deputy even had to abandon his police cruiser in the extremely cold conditions after being stranded for 7 hours. 

Here on Bainbridge, spring has sprung. There have been a few conversations over lunch at YES! about how warm this winter has been. Usually, Bainbridge gets at least a little bit of snow, but this year, we've only been dusted once. Although I can't complain, I wonder how it will affect the crops and if this will have consequences. Nonetheless, I'm going to enjoy the sunshine.

The last few weekends, I've taken a stroll down to Eagle Harbor and sat on the driftwood watching the ferry dock and depart. With the shore being very rocky, it's better to just sit and listen to the water slosh up rather than brave walking on the slippery stones. I've done it, and it's not as fun as walking on the smooth, sandy shoreline of Lake Michigan.

The flowers are blooming on the island.

Look at all those rocks. Very hard to walk on them.

Glass bottle on shore.

Eagle Harbor

My dad keeps asking if I've gotten any pictures of the mountains. Here's a pic of the ferry coming back from Seattle and the mountains in the background.

Vows to my future partner + Valentine's Day shenanigans

Isn't this raspberry chocolate ladybug truffle from Bon Bon the cutest? It even has spots in the shape of hearts. 

"I vow to always hand-write you a Valentine's letter to explain how much I love you. I vow to set the alarm 15 minutes early every morning so we have time to cuddle before getting ready for work."

As I laid in my bed last night thinking about love (because of Valentine's Day, of course), I started to ramble off promises I wanted to make with my future partner - the whole time replaying the scene from The Vow, and envisioning a "perfect" relationship where you can be goofy, serious, loving, 100 percent yourself and know your partner still cherishes you.

You see, that's the type of relationship I want. That's the type of relationship I've had and the type of relationship I hope to experience again. Although I'm single this Feb. 14th, I am not wallowing. I am so grateful for the people in my life. I'm not sad that I don't have a Valentine because I can feel it in my bones that my partner will come to me when the time is right. It might be someone already in my life, or it might be someone I've yet to meet, but my heart flutters at the thought that I will someday spend this day with my other half (I know, I know, ahh the gush). And I refuse to be one of those desperate lovers who settles - and I'd suggest you not be that person either because life is too short.

This morning I grabbed toast from Blackbird Bakery and in the display case sat homemade X & O cookies for lovebirds on the island. Right then I realized that this year I had not felt so turned off to Valentine's Day. Here on Bainbridge Island, I am hardly bombarded by consumerism. Almost all the businesses here are locally-owned, meaning I haven't encountered aisles and aisles of v-day exploitation. This, I think, has made me more aware of my feelings toward the holiday: that it should be more rooted in love than generic gifts.

Many feel obligated to get their honey a box of chocolates or a bouquet of red roses, but just because commercials and society say that's how it should be, doesn't mean we shouldn't challenge that thinking. My roommate works at Bon Bon, the local candy shop in Winslow, and we all know that the store is going to be packed today with desperate customers asking what they should get their significant other. Hint: not some last minute, random piece of chocolate.

You see, it's not about the present. To me, Valentine's Day is about cherishing the person you love, your partner. I watched this beautiful video (and then couldn't help watching the whole series), which asked couples how they would describe their feelings for their partner without using the word "love." It's so easy to say you love someone, but describing why can deepen those feelings and reveal just how much you care. In my opinion, telling your Valentine why or how you love them could truly be the best gift you give them.

So maybe open yourself up to alternative ways to celebrate your love this Valentine's Day. Write down all the things that you love about your significant other. Hug them a little tighter, and kiss them a little longer. Give them a true compliment about their character. Put a song on and slow dance to it. Hold their hand. Tell them one of your favorite memories together. Make dinner together. Do something for your partner just because you know it will make them happy. Show them how much you care because when it truly comes down to it, the little things are what count, not the material items.

It's always nice to know that my parents are thinking about me. They sent me a countdown to Valentine's Day box. I was instructed to open one bag a day until the 14th. My parents definitely know me well because today I opened Dove dark chocolates and strawberry Peeps (my fav), but I especially liked the personalized messages they printed & pasted on the box.

I walked into the YES! office on Friday and at every desk was a red tulip, Red Hots in the shape of hearts, and a chocolate heart. It definitely brightened my day and put me in the Valentine's spirit.

Although I'm not a fan of consuming these candy hearts, they sure are a cute decoration in the YES! office.

Tulip from work #ValentinesDaySelfie

Part V: TWILIGHT

On our way to the rainforest side of Olympic National Park, we had to stop in Forks. You know, the town that Twilight is based on. Although the movies were not actually filmed in the real Forks, Wash., Stephenie Meyer (the author) had chosen the town because of its ridiculous amount of rain, and small town status. When she was researching Forks, she found that the La Push Reservation was very close, too, which fit the story of Jacob (the guy pictured above).

"My Forks had become such a real place in my head that I was sure the reality would have some kind of jarring difference." Meyer wrote about the first time she visited Forks. "It wouldn't look like the pictures, maybe, or there would be some huge flaw that would make my story impossible in that setting. But as we flew in, low over the densely green hills with the incredible Cascades Mountains touching the clouds to the south, I stopped worrying."

When we first drove into the town, it reminded me a lot of my hometown (Shelby, Mich.). It was super small, kind of run down, and basically just a road of town. We went to the chamber of commerce and they had a little map of landmarks for tourists to visit. So, we took a few pictures with the cardboard cutouts and were on our way through the self-guided tour.

Forks - we're here!

My sparkly sidekick, Edward Cullen.

Don't be parking in Carlisle's spot.

Bella's dad is a police officer. Here's his cruiser.

Welcome to the Cullen house.

Note from Esme.

Can you imagine Edward playing the piano for you?

Where Bella and Edward first met - Forks High School.